When I started my blog I told myself that I would make sure to have at least one post a week because I didn’t want to turn it into my Livejournal where I read friends’ posts and never write anything myself. However, I just don’t have the emotional vigour to write anything fun this week, and I’m at a weird period with book reading where I have one to review for Fanboy Comics that is taking me longer to read than it should for the short length. Once I make it to the end and whip up a review I do have one in the chamber for the blog. It’s a lesbian romantic thriller, so I know it may not be to everyone’s taste, but I’m all about equal representation in the works I read for review.
Now the personal stuff…a friend of mine lost her battle with cancer on Monday, so I’m in a bit of a tailspin over that plus my youngest cat has lost a pound between November and his dental last Tuesday. Given that Rhys is FIV positive little changes can be extremely dangerous although his bloodwork still looks good. I felt like I just can’t get ahead with their medical needs, and I will never be able to make enough money to care for all of them to the extent that I’d like to (I didn’t have the money to get a broken canine extracted for Rhys, which really made me feel like a terrible pet owner.) Yeah, the black dog of depression was biting me hard.
I’ve pulled myself out of that hole thanks to Breaking Bad (yeah, weird show for depression, but it somehow worked), but I still lack the emotional fuel to be creative. I’m just trying to be good to myself, not push myself to give more than I can, and appreciate that my animals are okay for the moment.
On a more positive note:
If I can afford to register I think I’m ready to try running the Capitol 10K this year. I almost run a 10K twice a week with Patience, so while I don’t expect to win any awards I think it’s a good goal. Besides running helps shake the black dog from my heels (he doesn’t like moving too quickly), and it boosts my self-esteem when I accomplish a task.